updates of my oh-so-hectic-yet-not-really-productive life

here are the things:

1. my brother has officially entered the last legal form of slavery. yap, he is married now. the celebration was soo lovely, my bestfriends came along, my boyfriend did too. the food was awesome, i had the best soup ever. the bride and groom were so cute. and i saw my mom in her most beautiful appearance i've ever seen, wearing konde and red kebaya. but the worst part is the post party situation. my house was like wrecked ship. we were all tired and my body was just like burned. plus, the thing that was freaking me out was the fact that my brother and his wife will stay in my parents' house. and you know, they acted just like newly wed (indeed, they are). the point i'm talking is that it was soooo weird to see a couple in your own house and they were like genit to each other (esp. when it was your brother who did that, your ugly, fat, lazy, introvert brother).
2. i'm drowning in my duties at the office. the point is that i enjoy the job too much. so far i have made contact with fukuoka women's uni, kyung hee uni, shibaura, chuo, chubu, seoul national uni, chungnam, doshisha, kyungnam, and more.
3. my boyfriend was accepted at Department of Defence. oh my god, it was oh so wow, beyond words. happy to see him getting a path towards his future, hopefully it is a bright one.
4. finally, after being a lazy girl this past 3 months and also throwing away this semester tuition fee, i can finish my thesis title for god's sake. i'm so happy and wishing this will be a good beginning.

now, i just want to focus on how to get a balance life. wish me luck.

tale of a thesis

i'm writing this in the middle of a so called hurting stalemate between me and the topic of my thesis which has actually not officially become my thesis yet because i haven't submitted the title or furthermore had a supervising lecturer..

allow me start the tale.. so, as some people may know, i have big curiousity on security privatizing issue.. i started to write about this since i was in third semester.. i wrote "private security company in africa" for the class of politics and governance in africa, i got an a for this.. i also wrote "bush's policy in using private military company in iraq as a tactic to win two level game" for the class of politics of international cooperation, i got a b for this.. and it wasn't ended there yet, i wrote "the rise of private military companies in usa" for the class of politics and military, i got a b also for this..

all i can say is that i'm obesessed with this topic, i want to explore it as deep as i could.. and the only thing that crosses my mind when it comes to start a thesis is this topic.. then i came up with a topic about "private military company's role in un's peacekeeping operation".. one of my lecturers once said, when i had a discussion with him, that it's a good topic.. all i need to do was to find ONE CASE, just ONE, ONE F**KIN CASE.. and i couldn't find it for god's sake.. i found one, but when i tried to search the data, i faced a deadend..

then, i went to a lecturer, i want him to be my supervising lecturer for my thesis, he is a professor and not to mention also minister of national education in gus dur era, i worship him in a nutshell.. so then, i met him and gently asked him to be my supervising lecturer..
the disaster came when he asked me about my topic, and after i told him my topic, he cuntinued saying "read my books young lady, and find new inspiration because your topic is very difficult to elaborate and is not relevant with our study.."

there you go, i was like mother f**ker, damn.. it gave me sign that there is no way i can write this topic with him as my supervising lecturer, and if i continued the very same topic under different supervising lecturer, it's just the same as suicidal because he will definitely be one of the examining lecturers in my final presentation because my topic is related to the military and he's the best lecturer in military study in my department.. so the option left is that i have to change my topic, give up my obsession..

and curently i hooked on reading materials regarding united nations peacekeeping operation... yap, that's my new topic, but still, i haven't found a case and a title.. hopefully i can get along well with my thesis.. i'll pray for myself..

hi everyone

well, actually i'm not good in writing.. but i hope it is easier to type than write, so welcome to my blog.. enjoy it and don't even bother to have a look at the title of my blog..